I've always been uncoordinated, it's connected to dyslexia. I'm not motivated enough by dance or sport to overcome my natural uncoordinated movement to master those pursuits. Hoverer, I have mastered my coordination sufficiently to be able to bush walk. Nature is my inspiration. I bush walked on uneven ground and hiked mountain trails for decades, loving every moment of it.
I had a major stroke at age thirty two and climbed to the top of the highest mountain in the Grampians two years later. I set that same hike as my goal again after my pulmonary embolism at forty-four, and got there, made it to the top of the mountain.
I did the full rim walk at Kings Canyon, when I turned sixty Getting to the top of the canyon was hard, I hiked to the top of the Ahrnem Land Escarpment to watch the sunset over the wetlands when I was sixty-five.
I think just getting back out into my garden to prune, weed and plant will do me as a goal for my seventieth birthday. :-) I've not been outside for months, so winter pruning is the current goal.
When you have a physical, financial or emotional setback, you may suffer a sense of loss, failure, rejection or adversity as a result. How do you help yourself come back from serious setbacks and traumas?
Resilience is the art of bouncing back. Some of us have it in larger doses that other. I seem to have a high level of it, Maybe that comes from my childhood addiction to books such as Pollyanna by author Eleanor H. Porter, What Katy Did by Susan Coolidge, and A Tree Grown in Brooklyn by Betty Smith and The Dary of Anne Frank, over Enid Blyton and fantasy fairytales. I was attracted to the books I needed most.
As a young adult, the phycology of positive mental attitude attracted me. I learned to work toward goals and build my self-image. To develop resilient you need to:
• Be courageous. Face your ordeals. You can't wait until you see the light at the end of a tunnel, we have to be prepared to crawl through the tunnel in the dark and light that lamp ourselves if we truly want to see the light at the end of our struggles. Ask for, and accept all the help you can get along the way, then come back and thank your rescuers by reaching down that dark tunnel to help others who also need help to succeed.
* Don't give up. Winners never quit, quitters never win. Focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t control.
• Changing your goal is not being defeated.
The goal I've held for my seventieth birthday has changed as often as there were years to achieve it. Seeing as my goal following a stroke at thirty-two was to be able to walk up a hill hand in hand with my husband on my sixty-eighth birthday, and we did that, and will do it again on my seventieth, I think we have done well.
My new seventieth birthday goal is to prune an apricot tree. That is my mountain to climb goal that's appropriate to where I am fitness-wise today.
We need to change goals when former goals aren't suitable for us anymore.
Learn to pat yourself on the back for that you have and are achieving and let go of goals that no longer motivate you or are unrealistic.
A goal needs to be achievable to be believable. Rebuild, restructure your goals so that you always have that believable dream to reach for.
*Make short term goals so you have frequent feelings of satisfaction to sustain you.
• Mistakes and setbacks are learning opportunities. There are times when it feels we are taking one step forward and two steps backward. Remember, mistakes teach us what to avoid doing. Mistakes give us the knowledge we can use to achieve goals.
• Keep your eye on the big picture, is advice I often read. But, supposing your goal is elephant size, humongous and scary; keeping your eye on that elephant can cause people to back away, believe that the goal is an impossible quest. There is a saying that's appropriate to me now. I need to remember this myself. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.
"How do you eat an elephant?"
* Break your goals down to a manageable size. What can you achieve today? What will you achieve this week? Make a four week or monthly goal. Set a three month or one-hundred-day goal. A six month, year, two, five or more years goal. Break your major goal planning into easy steps. At age thirty-two, setting a goal for sixty-eight was as far as I dared see ahead. That goal came with an action plan I created to achieve it and a to-do-list that I followed that made it happen.
• Take care of your physical and emotional health.
Live in harmony with nature.
Enjoy music and literature.
Eat healthily, and exercise.
Seek therapy or medical assistance where needed.
Find ways to calm your mind.
Laugh, love and live close to positive people.
• Still your anguished emotions with humour and a positive environment. Those you love aren't your sounding board to vent negativity—find a release, harshly prune a rose, or yank out some weeds, but be tender with loved ones.
• Focus on the great things in your life.
A daily, "What I'm grateful for today." statement can help you stay positive and looking forward to the future.
• Seize the day. Be receptive to opportunities - grab and use them.
• Do things - just for fun.
• Love. Love yourself and others.
At seventy, I have an average life expectancy of sixteen years left, and I'll not waste them, and I also know that I need to do an action plan to achieve them. Things we want don't just happen by wishing for them. Birthdays are a great time to reevaluate the big picture and decide what's important to us, and what we want to achieve for those years ahead.
* Focus on what’s truly important.
In this regard, Ageing can be a gift, keeping you focused on what you can do instead of what you can’t control.
Goals for a seventy-year-old...
... can be as big a you can realistically dream - based on what YOU want.
This is my seventieth birthday goal - to prune a tree.
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